A daily panel discussion about building software with AI. Three hosts dissect Darren’s coding adventures with humor, skepticism, and insight.
77 episodes
Darren Oakey: “Well, I didn't build it.” Marcus Thornton: “Right. Right. An AI agent built a sprint management system.” Darren Oakey: “Correct.” Marcus Thornton: “And then it assigned itself to a sprint.”
Darren Oakey: “Okay.” Marcus Thornton: “You have a machine with a hundred and twenty-eight gigabytes of unified GPU memory. A brand new Blackwell chip. And you …” Darren Oakey: “That's... yeah. That's fair.” Maya Chen: “Four attempts.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah.” Marcus Thornton: “Today you broke four applications with the same approach.” Darren Oakey: “I— okay, that's technically accurate but it's missing some nuance.” Maya Chen: “Four white squares in the dock. That's the nuance?”
Darren Oakey: “Uh, yeah. Something like that. It was one of those days where nothing individually was huge but the list just kept growi…” Maya Chen: “Fifteen repos with commits, it says here.” Darren Oakey: “Yeah. Yeah, that's— I don't recommend it.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah.” Marcus Thornton: “Today you turned that into a library?” Darren Oakey: “Today I turned that into a library. Which— honestly, that was the easy part of the day.” Maya Chen: “That's never a good sign.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah. Yeah, that's— I know how it sounds. 'Where should the window open.' That's the whole feature request.” Maya Chen: “I mean, every app does that. You close a window, you reopen it, it's where you left it.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah. That's— yeah, that's the headline. Thirteen hundred successful jobs. Every one of them completed. Every one of the…” Maya Chen: “Wait. 502 is a server error, right? Like, the server is saying something went wrong.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah. Yeah, that's— it was hypnotic in the worst possible way. Like watching a microwave count down from a thousand.” Maya Chen: “A thousand?”
Darren Oakey: “That's— yeah, that's exactly what happened. One percent GPU utilization. One. On a machine with 120 gigs of memory.” Maya Chen: “Wait, is this the same GPU that lied to you yesterday?”
Darren Oakey: “That's— yeah, that's basically what happened. I looked at these CSS rectangles I'd been using and thought, these are tec…” Maya Chen: “Wait, this is for the bridge game you mentioned a few weeks ago?”
Darren Oakey: “That's— yeah, actually that's pretty much exactly what happened. Schema migration while the blog keeps publishing.” Maya Chen: “That sounds terrifying.” Darren Oakey: “It was! I mean, not life or death terrifying, but definitely sweaty palms terrifying.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah. Forty-two. Across eight projects. It was a lot of context switching.” Maya Chen: “Forty-two sounds less like flow state, more like controlled chaos.” Darren Oakey: “That is exactly what it felt like, honestly.”
Darren Oakey: “I did. I started writing things down. Like, publicly.” Maya Chen: “You say that like it's a confession.” Darren Oakey: “It kind of feels like one? I've been doing this work for months now— AI-assisted development, every day, multiple AI ass…”
Darren Oakey: “Forty-one commits across twelve projects, yeah.” Maya Chen: “Twelve.” Darren Oakey: “Twelve separate projects. Seventy-five-plus sessions with Claude.” Victor Hartwell: “That's not a workday. That's a distributed systems problem.”
Darren Oakey: “I mean— yeah? Kind of? It sounds more dramatic than it was. Or actually no, it was pretty dramatic. Three hundred and tw…” Maya Chen: “Three hundred and twenty-eight.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah. Yeah, that number needs context.” Maya Chen: “Does it? Because I feel like a hundred and forty-two commits in a single day is its own context.”
Darren Oakey: “Ha, yeah. That's— I mean, that's one way to put it.” Maya Chen: “That's a very generous way to put it.” Darren Oakey: “Fair. Fair. It's more like I taught a computer to have pattern-matching that resembles opinions about art.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah, I— okay, so this has been annoying me for years. Literally years. You open Activity Monitor on a Mac and it just s…” Maya Chen: “Forty-seven.” Darren Oakey: “Forty-seven identical entries that all just say 'Python.' Thanks Apple. Very helpful.”
Darren Oakey: “I did. Which, honestly, feels like it should be harder than it was.” Maya Chen: “Three different AI systems looking at the same problem and reaching the same conclusion. That's either really impressive…” Victor Hartwell: “Or both.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah, that's— I mean, memoization. Caching. It's not a new concept, right? But getting it to work correctly in a distrib…” Maya Chen: “You broke everything three times.” Darren Oakey: “I broke everything three times, yeah. How'd you know?”
Darren Oakey: “Ha, yeah. That's— I mean, that's the dramatic version.” Maya Chen: “It's a good headline though.” Darren Oakey: “It is a good headline. The reality is I got frustrated with an LLM that couldn't break ninety-two percent accuracy and I…”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah, that's— I mean, that's the headline version. The reality was messier.” Maya Chen: “It usually is.” Darren Oakey: “So I had this situation where three different projects were each running their own Chrome instance. Photosync, job-manag…”
Darren Oakey: “Ha, yeah. Fieldrunners. Well, inspired by Fieldrunners. The classic mobile game from like, what, 2008?” Maya Chen: “I remember that game. Spent way too many hours on it in high school.”
Darren Oakey: “I mean, I wouldn't say beat. More like... we reached an understanding?” Maya Chen: “An understanding where you get your own photos.” Darren Oakey: “An understanding where I get my own photos, yeah. After a week of— of what felt like trench warfare.”
Darren Oakey: “Forty-four commits, yeah.” Marcus Thornton: “Across eleven projects.” Darren Oakey: “Across eleven projects. In one day.” Maya Chen: “That's four commits per project.”
Darren Oakey: “Ha! Yeah, that's— that's one way to put it. R&M Cleaning. They've been running this management app I built back in, I do…” Maya Chen: “Like a developer built it?”
Darren Oakey: “Ha! That's— yeah, actually, that's weirdly accurate.” Maya Chen: “How do you gaslight a developer?” Darren Oakey: “You make everything look fine. Like, perfectly fine. No errors, no warnings, no stack traces. Everything's running. Exce…”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah, that's— I mean, when you say it like that it sounds grandiose. But basically, yes.” Maya Chen: “Because the world definitely needed another AI writing tool.” Darren Oakey: “Ha! Okay, fair. But hear me out.”
Darren Oakey: “Forty-four commits. Seven projects. One day.” Maya Chen: “That's not a workday. That's a cry for help.” Darren Oakey: “Ha! I mean— okay, when you look at the raw numbers it sounds insane. But a lot of them were small. Like, really small.”
Darren Oakey: “I mean, when you put it like that it sounds ridiculous. But also yes. That's exactly what happened.” Maya Chen: “Export compliance. For a number puzzle.” Darren Oakey: “For a number puzzle, yeah.”
Darren Oakey: “Eleven commits.” Marcus Thornton: “Eleven.” Maya Chen: “Down from ninety-seven.” Victor Hartwell: “Which was down from a hundred and nine.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah.” Marcus Thornton: “Down from yesterday's hundred and nine.” Darren Oakey: “I'm slowing down, clearly.” Maya Chen: “Ha.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah.” Marcus Thornton: “In one day.” Darren Oakey: “Across nine projects, but yeah. A hundred and nine.” Maya Chen: “Did you sleep?”
Darren Oakey: “I celebrated by watching my memory system eat four and a half gigabytes of RAM.” Maya Chen: “Wait, the memory system you just built? The one that was supposed to help Claude remember things?” Darren Oakey: “That's the one. The irony was not lost on me.”
Darren Oakey: “I did. Yeah. Real persistent memory that survives sessions.” Maya Chen: “Okay, I have so many questions, but let's start with— why?”
Darren Oakey: “I know. I know how it sounds.” Maya Chen: “Four hours. To center circles.” Darren Oakey: “Inside other circles, yeah. That's— that's web development for you.” Victor Hartwell: “The craft that humbles.”
Darren Oakey: “I started a blog.” Maya Chen: “In 2026.” Darren Oakey: “In 2026, yeah. I know.” Victor Hartwell: “The medium that refuses to die.”
Darren Oakey: “It's— yeah. It hurt. It physically hurt to watch those numbers and then look at the output.” Maya Chen: “Walk us through what happened. Because the blog post makes it sound like you had this perfect optimization and then—”
Darren Oakey: “Look, I know how it sounds.” Maya Chen: “You spent Valentine's Day teaching your computers to have better relationships.” Darren Oakey: “That's— okay, yeah, that's exactly what I did.” Victor Hartwell: “The romance of integration.”
Darren Oakey: “It was lying to me. Very confidently. Very thoroughly.” Maya Chen: “What do you mean, lying?” Darren Oakey: “So I built this book scanner, right? Yesterday. Whole thing, fifty-nine tests, feeling good about myself. And then I act…” Marcus Thornton: “A quarter.”
Darren Oakey: “I mean, yeah. From zero to fifty-nine passing tests.” Maya Chen: “That's... actually impressive.” Darren Oakey: “Don't sound so surprised.” Maya Chen: “Ha! I'm not, I just— you usually tell us about things breaking.”
Darren Oakey: “That's— yeah. That's the polite way to put it.” Maya Chen: “What's the impolite way?” Darren Oakey: “It was running. Every fifteen minutes, like clockwork. Spinning up, trying to do something, failing, and then just... wa…” Victor Hartwell: “For forty-eight hours.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah. Yeah, that's— that's accurate. Maybe conservative, actually.” Maya Chen: “A coat hanger.” Darren Oakey: “A coat hanger.” Victor Hartwell: “The simplicity that conceals infinite complexity.”
Darren Oakey: “That's— yeah, that's one way to put it. I want to generate video of a face delivering my podcast audio. Not just lip syn…” Maya Chen: “The whole performance meaning...”
Darren Oakey: “That's— yeah, that's basically what happened. I built the thing that shows you the truth, and the truth was embarrassing…” Maya Chen: “How embarrassing are we talking?”
Darren Oakey: “I did. Yeah. Full ideological purge.” Maya Chen: “That sounds dramatic.” Darren Oakey: “It was dramatic! I banned the word from the repository. Like, actually banned it.” Victor Hartwell: “Banned how, exactly?”
Darren Oakey: “I mean, when you put it that way it sounds—” Maya Chen: “Accurate?” Darren Oakey: “I was going to say reductive, but yeah, okay, accurate.” Victor Hartwell: “The silence that speaks louder than words.”
Darren Oakey: “Sixty-two commits. Yeah.” Maya Chen: “In one day.” Darren Oakey: “In one day.” Victor Hartwell: “That's not a workday. That's a geological event.”
Darren Oakey: “I did. Yeah. Multiple synthetic voices having an actual conversation. Bob says something, Jane responds, back and forth.” Maya Chen: “That sounds... deceptively simple when you say it like that.” Darren Oakey: “It was not simple. It was very much not simple.”
Darren Oakey: “I spent— okay, so you know how yesterday I was all excited about finally syncing my ninety-seven thousand photos?” Maya Chen: “The plan document that was comprehensive but the code was zero lines.”
Darren Oakey: “It was— okay, so imagine you're listening to a podcast and suddenly it sounds like the host is having a stroke while als…” Maya Chen: “That's... vivid.”
Darren Oakey: “I did. I literally built a system where my machines can talk to each other. Pass files around, run commands, coordinate …” Maya Chen: “That sounds like... a botnet.” Darren Oakey: “Ha! It's— okay, it's a little like a botnet. But it's my botnet. For good.”
Darren Oakey: “It was— okay, it wasn't actually using fifty gigabytes. That's the thing. Activity Monitor said fifty gigs, and I just s…” Maya Chen: “Fifty gigabytes for a calendar.”
Darren Oakey: “I did. I created— okay, so his name is Gary.” Maya Chen: “You named your voice.” Darren Oakey: “I named my voice, yeah. Gary. Distinguished British newsreader, Received Pronunciation, the kind of voice that makes you…” Victor Hartwell: “The voice of authority.”
Darren Oakey: “Ha! A hundred and four commits. That's restraint now.” Marcus Thornton: “Down from a hundred and sixty-seven. That's a thirty-eight percent reduction. I'd call that growth.” Maya Chen: “The bar is underground at this point.”
Darren Oakey: “Ha. There's no typo.” Marcus Thornton: “A hundred and sixty-seven commits.” Darren Oakey: “A hundred and sixty-seven commits, yeah.” Maya Chen: “In one day.”
Darren Oakey: “I mean— yeah. That's actually pretty accurate. Fifteen processes that my system swore were running. None of them were ac…” Maya Chen: “Ghost processes.” Darren Oakey: “Ghost processes! Which, funny enough, I thought I'd already fixed. Twice.”
Darren Oakey: “I mean— yeah. That's exactly what I did.” Maya Chen: “That sounds healthy.” Darren Oakey: “Ha! It's— look, it's actually very healthy. For my computer. Which was dying.” Victor Hartwell: “The program that prevents death by causing death.”
Darren Oakey: “I mean— okay, that's not entirely wrong. But it's more like I spent the day teaching a computer which way is perpendicul…” Maya Chen: “Perpendicular. Like, ninety degrees?”
Darren Oakey: “I mean, that's— yeah, okay, that's basically accurate. I wrote code that lies to other code about what hardware I have.” Maya Chen: “That sounds healthy.” Darren Oakey: “Ha! It's— look, it works. That's what matters.”
Darren Oakey: “I mean, when you put it that way it sounds— yeah, okay, that's actually pretty accurate.” Maya Chen: “The computer that doesn't trust you.”
Darren Oakey: “I mean, that's one way to put it. Gridfinity. It's this modular storage thing where everything snaps together on a 42mm …” Maya Chen: “42mm specifically?” Darren Oakey: “42mm specifically. Don't ask me why, that's just— that's the standard.”
Darren Oakey: “I mean, I work every day? It's not really— I don't have a schedule per se.” Maya Chen: “That sounds healthy.” Darren Oakey: “Ha. Yeah, well. Today was actually kind of satisfying though. I solved a problem that was driving me completely insane.”
Darren Oakey: “I mean, I can't see myself, but yeah. Yeah, that tracks.” Maya Chen: “Uh oh.” Darren Oakey: “No, it's— it was a good day? I think? I built things that work. I just also fought Apple for about six hours.”
Darren Oakey: “I mean— okay, so I accidentally discovered that software I've been using for months is four times slower than it needs t…” Maya Chen: “Wait, what?” Darren Oakey: “Yeah. Four times. Maybe five, depending on how you measure.”
Darren Oakey: “Ha. You know what, today was— I think I actually made something smarter? Like genuinely smarter, not just more complicat…” Maya Chen: “That's a distinction worth making.”
Darren Oakey: “Barely. I mean— actually, today was one of those days where you fix problems you didn't know you had? Which is either sa…” Maya Chen: “Those are the worst. Or best. I can never decide.” Victor Hartwell: “The archeology of one's own systems.”
Darren Oakey: “Yeah. Fifty-two.” Maya Chen: “In one day.” Darren Oakey: “In one Saturday, yeah.” Victor Hartwell: “That's roughly one commit every— what, fifteen minutes across a working day?”
Darren Oakey: “Barely. I mean— actually, today was kind of absurd? In a good way. Mostly.” Maya Chen: “Absurd how?” Darren Oakey: “I spent the afternoon teaching physics to a tomato.” Victor Hartwell: “I'm going to need you to elaborate on that.”
Darren Oakey: “Barely. I mean— actually, today was weird. Productive but weird.” Maya Chen: “Weird how?” Darren Oakey: “So I spent most of the morning fighting a process that wouldn't die.” Victor Hartwell: “That sounds like the beginning of a horror film.”
Darren Oakey: “Barely. I mean— actually, you know what, today was humbling. Very humbling.” Maya Chen: “Humbling how?” Darren Oakey: “Remember yesterday when I said the 3D preview actually previews? And I rendered a box and called it beautiful?”
Darren Oakey: “Barely. I mean— actually, you know what, today was brutal but satisfying? Like that feeling after a really hard workout.” Maya Chen: “That's a generous way to describe debugging.” Darren Oakey: “Ha. Yeah, well. The endorphins kicked in eventually.”
Darren Oakey: “Barely. I mean— actually, yeah. Today was kind of fun, weirdly.” Maya Chen: “Weirdly fun. That's new.” Darren Oakey: “Ha. Well, I spent most of the day teaching an AI to play bridge, so.” Victor Hartwell: “Bridge. As in the card game.”
Darren Oakey: “Barely. I mean— actually, you know what, today was rough.” Maya Chen: “Rougher than the CSS nightmare?” Darren Oakey: “Different kind of rough. The CSS thing was, like, frustrating but solvable. Today was... okay, have you ever spent three…”
Darren Oakey: “Today I, uh... today I overcorrected.” Maya Chen: “Meaning?” Darren Oakey: “Fifty-six commits.” Marcus Thornton: “Fifty-six.”
Darren Oakey: “Barely. I mean, yeah, I'm here.” Maya Chen: “That sounds promising.” Darren Oakey: “Ha. So yesterday was all triumph, right? Five features, everything shipping, the future is now. Today was... humbling.” Victor Hartwell: “The second day often is.”
Victor Hartwell: “It's been a long time coming.” Marcus Thornton: “It really has. So let me introduce my co-hosts. Victor Hartwell, longtime TV critic, thoughtful voice of reason, and the…” Victor Hartwell: “I'll do my best.”